Prompt: Reasons to Believe

Pen & Mend Journal Prompt (No. 70) Create a list of what restores your hope when it’s hard to hold on.

Upcoming Events // Save-the-Dates

Before we begin this month’s prompt, I want to share a few upcoming invitations to gather virtually in community and tend to our hearts through writing:

• June’s Write Your Grief Journaling Session, Wednesday, June 11th, 9 AM PT

• June’s Pen & Mend Writing Room and AfterWords Conversation, Friday, June 13th at 9 AM PT

• July’s Write Your Grief Journaling Session, Wednesday, July 9th, 9 AM PT

• July’s Pen & Mend Writing Room and AfterWords Conversation, Friday, July 18th at 9 AM PT

The following events are open to everyone. To join the Pen & Mend Writing Room and AfterWords Conversations, you’ll need to upgrade to a paid subscription. To register for Write Your Grief sessions, visit the links below—paid subscribers receive a special discount on these events.

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A Gentle Disclaimer

This reflection includes mentions of emotional and spiritual darkness, despair, and hopelessness. While it doesn’t divulge details or directly discuss suicide, it does touch on themes that may resonate with those navigating depression or spiritual struggle. If you’re in a tender place today, please care for yourself as you read. If you’re struggling or feeling overwhelmed, help is available — call or text 988 at any time to connect with a trained counselor. The service is free, confidential, and available 24/7.

—May you take good care of yourself, Kristin

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In the Darkness of Despair

It happens in the darkness of winter (but it visits anytime, even on the sunniest of summer days). It creates a place where belief struggles to breathe. A place where my weary heart fights to hold on through despairing winds that rip through me like a tornado. In the aftermath, I feel tired and worn.

When the darkness passes over, it often casts a shadow of permanence. I wonder if you’ve ever experienced it or something similar? In the moment, it can seem as though the storm will never end, the winds will never cease, and the light may never break through the thick cloud of midnight again. When it happens, the mind can get pulled away into thoughts of worthlessness, hopelessness, and defeat. Our spirit may resist, but the weight of it all still lingers in our bodies, leaving us longing for rest, for light, for a reason to believe.

I’m reminded of a poem that my former coaching client and writing friend, Katie Drobina, wrote called “birdsong.” In the poem, she writes, “I’ve heard it said that the early morning / song of a bird is a triumphal call of survival, / as if to say, / ‘I’ve made it through the night! Have you?’”

Reasons to Believe

I make a list in a time of melancholy after listening to the song “A Long December” by Counting Crows. Their opening lyrics catch my attention: “A long December and there's reason to believe / Maybe this year will be better than the last.”

There’s reason to believe… I can’t stop thinking about these lyrics, and I feel inspired to create a list of reasons to believe. Morning birdsong happens to be the first thing that makes my list.

Whether it’s belief that things will get better, belief that there’s more to life than what we see, belief in oneself, belief in goodness, belief in God’s love, belief in miracles, or belief that life is worth living—belief becomes reinstated and renewed through this list of noticing.

I note the moments that bring breath to my spirit, rekindle the fire in my heart, and feel like the gentle morning sun falling across the shadowy recesses of my mind. I note what awakens me from the dark night and fills me with fresh hope and renewed strength to keep going, to rise¹ again.

Some moments are small and so unbelievably ordinary yet enchantingly beautiful that they can take your breath away. Such ordinary moments can radiate a sense of wonder and love, holding a paradoxical simplicity and extraordinary complexity that leave you speechless. Some moments are profound, miraculous, and inexplicable in a way that can only lead to a deeper sense of belief and trust in God. Such transcendent moments move us to such joy and awe that we weep in wonder.²

Wonder threads itself through our hearts, weaving us with renewed hope.

I write my list of reasons to believe, paint a mini oil pastel, share both on Instagram, and add the list to my Down Days Journal.³

kristinvanderlip

A post shared by @kristinvanderlip

This non-exhaustive list of reasons to believe offers threads of life that hold me in the light the next time the darkness comes, and now I offer it to you.